I’m engaged! FINALLY! At 32, I’ll be getting married. And let me just say, he, and all the potential our life holds together was/is worth the wait.
I wanted to share my story of how he actually proposed, but first before I do that, I want to say a few things: I know a lot of you have been coming to my blog, or found my blog because I’m single and I’ve written about being single off and on. Rest assured, I am not one of those women whose life is going to revolve around the wedding or my new roll as fiance or soon-to-be wife, although certainly that will come up now and then. I’ve spent a lot of years single, I understand that life stage intimately, and I still feel called to write for and hopefully encourage those who are single. After all, some of the people that have meant the most to me in my singleness have been my married friends, and I certainly hope to be that kind of married person as well. I also want to say for any of you singles reading this that I, more than anyone, know that I haven’t done anything to get myself to this point, I’m not any better, or more deserving than any of you who are still longing. I didn’t magically figure something out that made it all happen. I wish I could give you a formula or a genie in a bottle, but it just doesn’t work that way, as much as we’d like it to sometimes. Even being in it, there are things to this whole process that are still a mystery to me. I will say that I hope to share from my own experience the things I learned along the way. Some of the things that didn’t make sense to me then, but make a little more sense now. Things like – what in the world do people mean when they say they “just knew” or the fine line between a healthy love and affection and something less than, or at least what those things have looked like for me. I hope you stick around even though I’m no longer single, and I hope you are encouraged as much.
OK, now The Whole Story:
Like most people nowadays Travis and I had talked about getting married before the question was “officially” put on the table. So I knew it was coming, and I waited…. and waited a little more…. and waited a little more. Now Travis was trying to manage all of this. Get the ring, meet my family, try to communicate to me that he’s not putting me off, and at the same time keep it a surprise. In the week before he officially proposed I may have had an emotional “why aren’t we engaged already” moment. Travis told me to trust him, not to worry about it, and to stop putting pressure on it, from the standpoint of he was going as fast as he could, as (and I knew this) the ring was taking much longer than originally thought to get. And that is another story in itself.
Anyway, last Friday I headed up to IA to spend my birthday weekend with him. My birthday was on Saturday. When I arrived at his parent’s house, he had my birthday presents set out on the bed I sleep in there. The ones from him were not wrapped, but instead tied with ribbons that just so happened to be the colors we had discussed using for the wedding. I tried not to read anything into that specifically. One of the gifts was a yankee candle in the”wedding day” scent. Again, I tried not to read too much into it. I mean, I was working hard at not worrying and taking the pressure off, like he had requested.
He took me to dinner, and I got to pick where, so naturally, I picked Mexican. Nothing fancy or out of the ordinary for us. After dinner we went back to his parent’s house to watch a movie, but were unsuccessful at getting the code to work so we could watch it. We ended up just sitting around a little and at one point he said “What’s your birthday wish?” I ummed a little and said, “I don’t know” so he pressed again, and I responded “Well I do have one, but I’m not allowed to talk about it.” He smiled and laughed a little, and responded with “Well, if you wish on a shooting star maybe it will come true.” Once again, I brushed it off as him teasing a little and didn’t think much of it. We talked a little more about random things I’m sure, until I said, “I’m tired, I think I could totally fall asleep right now.” At this point Travis made a change in plans. He was originally planning to pop the question at 11:59, right before my birthday cause at one point he had promised me it would be before my birthday, but since I was so tired, he moved it up a little. We talked a little more, and then in a totally casual everyday kind of way, he suggested we go for a walk, cause it would just be silly to go to bed before 9 on a Friday, and maybe a walk will give us some energy. I agreed, it was a nice night, but a little cool, so we stopped by his place so I could get a jacket, and unbeknownst to me he could get the ring.
He took me to the church that his parents go to (He attends a different one in town). There was a big field next to the church that they usually keep mowed to a reasonable length. It was super dark in the field, and we could see the stars so clearly. We found a good spot to stand and look up. He told me he just saw a shooting star, so I responded with “where, where? I didn’t see it!” And he proceeded to explain to me how I could try and see one. He pointed out the big dipper, and the North Star – which was kind of cool cause his last name means “from the north.” I’m totally not catching on to any of this though. It just seems like a regular night with Travis to me. Next he reached his hand up like he was touching the sky, it was dark and I could barely see it. And he said, “Sometimes if you reach your hand up like this….” he pulled his hand down in front of him and said “you’ll catch a falling star” – in that exact moment, some lightning flashed off in the distance, and lit up the ring in his hand. I gasped, and he responded with “see, I told you it would happen before your birthday.” He then dropped to one knee in the wet grass, and asked me to marry him, and of course I said yes.
A few mintues later, he asked if I wanted to walk back to where it was light so I could see my ring. Of course I did. He did great with it – it’s perfect. Here is a picture.