Ok, I haven’t written in FOR-EV-ER… mostly because I can’t even now begin to try and explain what God is doing in me right now. It’s good, and it’s hard, and I’m excited to see where He takes me in this little journey I’ve been on with Him recently. But still now, I don’t really know how to explain it, even for myself in my own head.
In someways I feel a little lost right now, but in the best way possible. In a, I know God is in control, and God is working, and although I don’t have all of the pieces, I know it’s going to great, kind of way. Which, is really one of my favorite places to be.
But, it also involves, God poking around, and pointing out some things I need to change, some ugliness, that I was oblivious to, in my own life/heart. And at the same time, I wonder if some of it, is just a little bit of a spiritual attack, because God is working and moving in ways, in me that I haven’t experienced in a while.
I know, it’s all rather vague… it’s all rather vague to me right now too, but there is one concrete tangible thing in the middle of it that I can share. I’m currently homeless, church homeless that is…. Well, kind of, but not really. As far as a building and specific service I’m attending, I’m homeless. I have a lot of people in my life that, are the Church to me, in a much more important way, than any building or service is, and I’m grateful for that. No matter where I choose to attend on a Sunday, I know these same people are going to be around me, living the Christian life, encouraging me, and I them, and isn’t that what Church is really about anyway?
There were just a few things, that I just felt like kept coming up in me, over and over again, and about a month or so ago, I just finally made the decision that I need to find another church. It’s not that there is anything “wrong” with Westside necessarily, just not right for me anymore. It’s been a little bittersweet.
Moving churches, certainly isn’t everything that God is doing in me right now, but it is a part, and it’s a part that I image will continue to be both good and hard.
As Beth Moore has said, “you wouldn’t waste a prayer on me.”